Sunday, November 06, 2005

All the arms around you now

It's the little imperfections, it's the sudden change in plans, when she
misreads the directions
and we're lost but holding hands.

Well tomorrow is the day that best friends man, Dave leaves Albury on his way back to Canada (via Melbourne and Thailand) and understandably they are both a bit sad. I mean unless best friend moves over there (over there being the other side of the world), they are pretty much never going to see each other. Even if she does, it won't be for a little while and it's still going to be hard.

Being in a long distance relationship myself (even if it is 300kms compared to 3000) I can sympathise. Although the longest I have not seen the man for is probably 7-8 weeks absolute tops.

But the thing is, and this is what is going to make it harder for best friend is that the man and I's relationship has always been long distance, we don't know anything different! We are used to seeing each other for 2 days and then on average not for another 2/3 weeks. Where as best friend and her man have seen each other pretty much daily for the past month or so, AND they have lived together.

However the thing about long distance relationships (and this is very important to remember) is that if you love the person enough (and vice versa) it doesn't matter. You MAKE it work. If you can do that you KNOW you have something special because the relationship can handle ANYTHING you throw at it.

Lots of people our age do the long distance thing, it stands to reason that this point in life not everyone is going to be at the same stage (or location!).

In this day and age technology does make things a little easier. You have webcam and MSN, the phone, VOIP and cheap (or free) phone calls all these things that can make it a little easier.

Communication and how you relate to each other plays a big part in it, for instance I could talk ALL night on the phone to the man but can barely say 5 words on the phone to turtle-lips.

SO long distance relationships aren't a lot of fun and if there isn't a light at the end of the tunnel then its going to be even harder. BUT, if you love each other you MAKE it work. None of this too far away business, if you think they are too far away then it probably wouldn't work if you lived with each other either. Its definitely character building though!


jase said...

Meh, maybe some people need the physicality of having someone there and being without it is what they cant handle. Well, not for long anyways. Love nonwithstanding.
And yeah... a lot of people are in it for the 'now' aspects of a relationship. I know im not ready for something where I have to commit to someone, let alone someone far away. Just different stages in life, i guess, regardless of age....

jenu said...

Yeah sure, but what I'M saying is that distance doesn't really matter if you LOVE someone. Not talking about a 'now' relationship, if you love someone then you will do anything for them. If you can't handle something as simple as not seeing each other then how are you going to handle other problems that the relationship might encounter?

And also, what would happen if you fell in love with someone when you were in a 'now' relationship. I personally do not see how if you truly love someone you can throw that away and justify it by saying that the time isn't right. If you can, well then I don't think it could really be love.

Thats my thoughts anyway, they don't have to agree with yours or anyone elses :)

jase said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
jase said...

Loves a lofty ideal and far removed from the harshness of reality, unfortunately.
Im sure, love nonwithstanding, that it just cant work for some people because theyre scared of what it means.
I guess its for the best if people are moving in different directions.
Ahh well, no more on this! :P